Dragoncon Report Part 2: Robert Englund <3 teh J-Horror
Saturday
I dragged my ass out of bed, determined to make every horror buff’s pilgrimage…to see Robert Englund!
I got dressed, and as I waited for the rest of the crew to perform their daily ablutions, sat at the window to watch the annual Dragoncon parade amble past.
This year, besides the approximately 30,000 Storm Troopers that march down the street, there was a Longcat. Yup, Dragoncon is chock full of b-tards (of course, I know almost every 4chan meme, despite never going on /b/, so maybe it’s not as bad I think). Longcat was carried like the dancing dragons in Chinese parades, by several people. Even six stories up I could hear spectators shrieking “Longcat is loooong!” God bless America.
(There was also an awesome Mach 5 from Speedracer- some guy actually modified his car to look exactly like it- and a Batmobile, some Disney princesses and about a billion and one superheroes)
My posse informed me that most of the previous night some asshole had been right below our window, shrieking this awful Joker laugh that kept them awake…six stories off the ground (no balconies at the Hilton). I of course was passed out with Gatorade intoxication and missed it. Damn.
I also learned that the night before, Shapiro Keats was hit on by a drunk chick. As he was coming back from his B5 panel, some blondie in high heels staggered up behind him, reeking of booze. She asked him to open the door for her because…she couldn’t find the handle! She was too drunk! And, as she explained, usually she didn’t get so drunk but tonight she was wearing a corset…! My poor husband backed away and ran for it. Luckily he has long legs and good eyesight (well, thick glasses anyway) so he made it into the elevator before she did.
Finally Shapiro Keats and I made our way to the Hyatt to see the lovely Mr. Englund. In case you have been living under a rock (or were born after 1990), Robert Englund is not only the star of about 34 Nightmare on Elm Street films, he was also in the sf miniseries V. So he’s like a genre double whammy.
Mr. Englund turned out to be charming and funny, and very well-spoken. He spoke at length about his past work (apparently in the 1970’s he was often cast as the redneck best friend/sidekick in sex comedies…who knew?) and what he’s doing now. I was gratified to hear that he is constantly acting, producing, and writing scripts or plays. I was also gratified to discover that we have the same favorite Freddy movie (Wes Craven’s New Nightmare) and he loves Japanese horror movies! Soulmates!
After Robert Englund’s panel Shapiro Keats and I wandered aimlessly around the three exhibit halls/dealers’ rooms with our mouths open and our eyes wide. I came up with a nice little haul:
Bettie Page stationary from the Dark Horse booth
A button of Gaz from Invader Zim for my work apron
The first live-action Dororo movie
That last one has been released in the U.S., sure…yeah.
After drooling a while over the super-expensive Museum Replicas costumes, we went our separate ways. I went to the Silk Road track, which is all about our favorite thing here at Yellow Menace: the yellow menace itself, Asian pop culture! The panels I wanted to see were:
Godzilla Trailers
Godzilla Stories
The trailers were one long reel of original Japanese previews for various Godzilla movies. Afterwards, I felt like I never needed to see another Godzilla movie again, because all the good parts are in the trailers. Just kidding- this weekend I am digging out Final Wars, Destroy All Monsters and Godzilla vs. King Ghidorah for a marathon. The best part was these two little kids in the front row with their dad (I guess) who were Godzilla experts; at the beginning of every trailer they would shriek out “Godzilla versus Destroyah!” or “Godzilla versus Rodan!”. I got my self-esteem back when they didn’t know King Cesar, though.
Afterwards was the Godzilla Stories panel, where the audience was invited to share their heartwarming Godzilla memories. Being one of the younger people in the panel, I was unable to recall any Saturday afternoon matinees of Godzilla at the local theater or favorite Godzilla toys from the 1960’s. So I had to tell about how my first date with Shapiro Keats was to see Godzilla 2000. Everyone was suitably heartwarmed.
After throwing up for 24 hours, what could possibly sound good to me? Yup, you guessed it- Chinese food. Since the Peachtree Mall (conveniently located between the Marriott and the Hyatt) cannot possibly hold the joyous flesh of about 40,000 geeks, we took our fried rice and sesame chicken back to the room to devour. Oishi! After I’d ascertained that my stomach had accepted the offering, we went back out to take pictures of costumers. As we were crossing the street we passed Richard Hatch and he smiled at me!
At 8:30 we attended the Ghost in the Shell panel presented by the anime track. Anime really isn’t a big thing at Dragoncon, but at least this year the room was bigger than the one last year, which was super-tiny. I am a huge drooling GitS fan, so of course I had to see this.
And, to be completely honest, it was the single worst convention panel I have ever attended.
Yeah, I’m totally calling them out. That panel sucked. Usually a panel presents some new information, or invites audience participation, or acts as a forum for debate. This panel did none of these things. It consisted of three guys who offered the following revelations:
There have been executive producers chosen for the live-action movie, but the panelists didn’t know who they were and cited no sources (We here at Yellow Menace ALWAYS cite our sources! Take that!).
There might be a Neuromancer movie in the works (yeah…for the last hundred years- it will never actually be made).
Kusanagi is badass.
Stand Alone Complex is for adults. Also, it rocks.
After a few minutes I began to doubt if the panelists had ever seen the Oshii films or read the manga, since all their observations were based on the Stand Alone Complex series. And when one of the panelists (supposedly a raving fan) failed to remember the name of Paz. Now, Paz isn’t one of the major characters, but there are only seven members in Section 9 and only one of them has more than a single name. I don’t think it’s difficult to remember all their names if you are a big fan. They were summarizing parts of the show. Don’t get me wrong, but I’m guessing if you’re attending a Ghost in the Shell panel…you’re probably a fan already and know all this stuff.
I apparently wasn’t the only one who was disappointed with the panel as I was, since people started fleeing in droves about five minutes in. I gave them thirty minutes before I took off.
After more costume snapping (more on this in Part 3), we sat in for some of the Killing Characters panel. Writers discussed the strangest, most elaborate way they have killed off their characters, and since the panel consisted of sf writers and one mystery novelist, there were some pretty crazy methods. Also, apparently many people will purchase at charity auctions the right to be a character in someone’s book, and to die in the story. John Ringo said he did that once and had to kill 74 people in one book. Wow.
Bedtime was about midnight, which was partially because I am old and can’t stay up late anymore, and partially because I had to be at a panel on Sunday at 10 a.m., a panel for…
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